The Stock Market Woes

The stock market woes as I grab for the handle bars on this scary roller coaster. When the stock market plummets, the job market and economy takes a dump. It scares me. In three months I will be out of school and dumped into that job market. As it is now, I work two part time jobs and am working with a debt consolidation law firm to keep from going into bankruptcy. As a graduate student, I am so much student loan debt as well. I turned the big 3-0 this summer and when the stock market is hurting I feel wounded as well.

I grew up with the mentality that if you work hard, good things will happen. But in the real world, I have to make it happen. UMass  Boston's career center is a joke. I had to reach out and find my own internship. I did an internship with the Coast Guard and I loved it, but now that I am out of the military the only military job I think I would want is as a civilian contractor. Those positions are so competitive and difficult to get. I apply on usajobs.gov over and over hoping to get a bite. No interviews yet!

I have recently taken on a marketing job. I only make money on commission. I had to do some training on walking away when they say "no" twice. I am very attentive and am willing to keep trying to sell the product, but they are right--at some point you need to walk away or you are wasting valuable time on people who are happy to sample the product but have no plan to buy it. I have a B.S. in journalism and for all the effort I put into getting that degree, I kick myself for not being able to make a career out of it. Most newspaper jobs pay $25,000- $30,000 a year. That's it. I have way more in student loan debt than that.

I think the job market in Boston is ridiculous anyways, because of the 70 colleges in Massachusetts and quarter of a million college students in the Boston area--I have a state school education. It's a snob market out there. But true enough, a master's degree at a state school still trumps a bachelors' degree from Harvard. But in all reality, I need to take my degree and move south, where it won't matter as much that I went to UMass Boston not Boston University. I think this school is great and I have loved every minute of it, but I'm being realistic.

As for the military, I miss it sometimes. I thought I would be a Soldier forever. My car is loaded up with Army National Guard stickers. The medical discharge shocked me. I put in 11 years. If I had four more years I would have gotten a medical retirement. Instead, I have no retirement, no 401 K, no life insurance plan, and now no dental insurance. All of that ended when I was pushed out. I also miss the Student Loan Repayment plan. Every year for six years the Army would pay back 15% of $20,000 of my student loans. I was three years into that program, when they pulled the plug. Sigh. Are you stressed out just reading this?

Well I just had my Jewish New Year. I think this year will be the beginning of many new things. My favorite Quincy psychic Pauline said she had not seen as good cards on anyone. She thought I would go from nothing to everything. She has been accurate so far. That sounds like a good plan to me. But like I said, I have to make it happen. I certainly cannot rely on the quagmatic stock market. It starts and ends with me.